Navratri days are only a few days long. People make Navratri as Loveratri. These days, many people will get a gem of their mind. After this, a lot of money will be spent on gifts, treats and outings. But the question is who should foot the bill when we go on a date? To a boy or a girl or both.
Let us try to understand how expensive dating can be from these statistics of America.
You must have heard about education loan, home loan or health loan. It is possible that you have taken this loan but paid it off. But have you ever heard of dating loans? Suppose HDFC, ICICI Bank starts offering dating loans like home loans and car loans.
We’re kidding. No bank in the world gives out loans in the name of dating, but currently a third of America’s youth are drowning in dating debt. They are enjoying a romantic life by taking loans.
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Thousands of years ago, India’s materialist philosopher Charvaka said – ‘Rin Kritva Ghritam Pibet’ means enjoy taking a loan. The new generation has slightly modified this knowledge and made it ‘Rin Kritva Dating Kuru’.
According to a survey by LendingTree, 30% of young people take loans for dating and are spending that money on dating. According to another survey, an average American spends approximately 1 crore on dating in their lifetime. This money is spent on restaurants, watching movies and giving expensive gifts to the partner.
No data is available for India, but the experience of people around says that the pressure to spend money during dating is mostly on boys. The more money a guy can spend, the more vibrant his dating life will be. Girls also expect that spending money is a boy’s job.
Young men take loans to keep girlfriends happy, should boys foot the bill if they go on a date?
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What is the dating story in India and what changes are needed? Let’s find out from a relationship coach..
Live a romantic life by taking a loan :
Love and business are opposites of each other. Where there is love there is no business and what is love if there is business? This principle has been around for a long time in the world of love.
Then came the era of globalization and the situation changed. Today the youth are pressured to go on dates and dating means empty pockets.
According to a survey by ‘Credit Karma’, 21% of American youth take loans of more than 50 thousand rupees a year to go into debt. Most of them are Generation Z i.e. the youth born after 1998.
India’s situation is no different. Here, the business of finding a partner through dating apps alone has reached 5 thousand crore rupees. Relationships – Young people are drowning in dating debt
How is the date trap becoming a problem for dating youth?
How does the search for a potential partner and a moment of peace push a person into debt? The answer lies in the theory of anthropology and biology.
‘Costly signaling theory’ i.e. theory of costly signals. According to this theory, attempts are made to attract a partner through costly signals.
For example, peacocks try to attract peacocks by spreading their beautiful feathers. For peacocks, shiny feathers are a coastal signal of expensive restaurants and luxury gifts.
The thing to keep in mind here is that there is no definitive proof that the ‘Coastly Signaling Theory’ works in relationships. Relationships – Young people are drowning in dating debt
Most men who date Lon :
There is one more thing worth noting in the worldwide dating loan statistics. In most cases boys take loans. It is natural that they usually spend money on dating bills and gift items.
But is this right for any balanced relationship? We asked relationship coach Dr. Spoke to Anjali…
A lifetime of duty for a few bucks :
Dr. Anjali says that at first glance it looks like a profitable deal for girls to pay boys’ bill on debt, but it is quite the opposite.
Nothing is free in relationships or business. Everything has to be paid for financially or emotionally. The idea that men should spend on their female partners also implies that women should submit to men and accept their favors.
For love and respect for equality in a relationship, there needs to be an equal sharing of the dating bill. Otherwise, women develop an unnecessary sense of duty towards their male partner.
Equality doesn’t just mean 50-50 :
Even in developed societies like the US and Canada, women earn only 60 to 70% of what men do. In a country like India, this figure is even less. Splitting the dating bill in half in this situation can be a dishonest decision towards women.
Canadian author Ann Ruchetto believes that the current economic and social structure is tilted in favor of men. They have more means of earning than women. Men are paid more than women even for doing the same job. In this case the bill should be divided not half and half but on the basis of income.
Suppose in a relationship, if the boyfriend’s salary is lower than the partner’s, then the female partner should get more salary, and if the female partner’s salary is lower, then this role should be played by the male partner.
You can take a loan and go on a date, but you can’t get love :
Dr. According to Anjali, money may be needed to go on a date, for fun or for initial attraction, but money does not define a relationship.
College bachelors dating also have zero income. This does not mean that their love must also be void. Money can be a way to show love, not to get love.
Demand equal time in the dating bill :
Sociologist and human behaviorist Professor (Dr.) B. S. Nigam explains that it is the primal instinct of all living beings to show power to a woman. It is the same with humans.
Previously, strong and agile men who hunted more were attracted to women. So later, rich and handsome boys from the upper class got the preference. Thus, the idea of favoring boys who spend more money was born.
But the present time is the same. No one wants to be under anyone here. Both men and women are earning money. One person’s privilege over another is eroding. In such a situation equality is also required in the dating bill. This is the need of the hour.